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Jason didn’t understand why his parents wouldn’t let him sell his little sister at the garage sale

The newly planted trees were held up by wooden frames in hopes they could survive the next storm

The Great Dane looked more like a horse than a dog

They finished building the road they knew no one would ever use

I purchased a baby clown from the Russian terrorist black market

He played the game as if his life depended on it and the truth was that it did

It’s not possible to convince a monkey to give you a banana by promising it infinite bananas when they die

When nobody is around, the trees gossip about the people who have walked under them

When he asked her favorite number, she answered without hesitation that it was diamonds

Imagine his surprise when he discovered that the safe was full of pudding

She insisted that cleaning out your closet was the key to good driving

As he entered the church he could hear the soft voice of someone whispering into a cell phone

They say that dogs are man’s best friend, but this cat was setting out to sabotage that theory

It isn’t true that my mattress is made of cotton candy

The changing of down comforters to cotton bedspreads always meant the squirrels had returned

All she wanted was the answer, but she had no idea how much she would hate it

It caught him off guard that space smelled of seared steak

Never underestimate the willingness of the greedy to throw you under the bus

There have been days when I wished to be separated from my body, but today wasn’t one of those days

The lyrics of the song sounded like fingernails on a chalkboard