They say people remember important moments in their life well, yet no one even remembers their own birth
My biggest joy is roasting almonds while stalking prey
A suit of armor provides excellent sun protection on hot days
As she walked along the street and looked in the gutter, she realized facemasks had become the new cigarette butts
It’s a skateboarding penguin with a sunhat!
Patricia found the meaning of life in a bowl of Cheerios
For the 216th time, he said he would quit drinking soda after this last Coke
Giving directions that the mountains are to the west only works when you can see them
If you like tuna and tomato sauce, try combining the two, it’s really not as bad as it sounds
The knives were out and she was sharpening hers
He was the type of guy who liked Christmas lights on his house in the middle of July
People generally approve of dogs eating cat food but not cats eating dog food
He poured rocks in the dungeon of his mind
They decided to plant an orchard of cotton candy
She can live her life however she wants as long as she listens to what I have to say
I’m not a party animal, but I do like animal parties
She wanted a pet platypus but ended up getting a duck and a ferret instead
He had decided to accept his fate of accepting his fate
The rain pelted the windshield as the darkness engulfed us
Tomatoes make great weapons when water balloons aren’t available