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If you really strain your ears, you can just about hear the sound of no one giving a damn

Sometimes, all you need to do is completely make an ass of yourself and laugh it off to realise that life isn’t so bad after all

She was sad to hear that fireflies are facing extinction due to artificial light, habitat loss, and pesticides

The two walked down the slot canyon oblivious to the sound of thunder in the distance

The best key lime pie is still up for debate

I used to live in my neighbor’s fishpond, but the aesthetic wasn’t to my taste

He was the type of guy who liked Christmas lights on his house in the middle of July

I really want to go to work, but I am too sick to drive

Nobody loves a pig wearing lipstick

He knew it was going to be a bad day when he saw mountain lions roaming the streets

All they could see was the blue water surrounding their sailboat

I used to live in my neighbor’s fishpond, but the aesthetic wasn’t to my taste

Having no hair made him look even hairier

The random sentence generator generated a random sentence about a random sentence

Toddlers feeding raccoons surprised even the seasoned park ranger

Andy loved to sleep on a bed of nails

If any cop asks you where you were, just say you were visiting Kansas

I liked their first two albums but changed my mind after that charity gig

I want a giraffe, but I’m a turtle eating waffles

She lived on Monkey Jungle Road and that seemed to explain all of her strangeness