🍣 KIK@ ROBINAQUE SEXTING & SKYPE, P SNAP, CUSTOM NUDES

He knew it was going to be a bad day when he saw mountain lions roaming the streets

It took me too long to realize that the ceiling hadn’t been painted to look like the sky

The bullet pierced the window shattering it before missing Danny’s head by mere millimeters

Carol drank the blood as if she were a vampire

There have been days when I wished to be separated from my body, but today wasn’t one of those days

It didn’t take long for Gary to detect the robbers were amateurs

He decided to fake his disappearance to avoid jail

When she didn’t like a guy who was trying to pick her up, she started using sign language

Warm beer on a cold day isn’t my idea of fun

The dead trees waited to be ignited by the smallest spark and seek their revenge

I don’t respect anybody who can’t tell the difference between Pepsi and Coke

Three years later, the coffin was still full of Jello

I’m a great listener, really good with empathy vs sympathy and all that, but I hate people

They got there early, and they got really good seats

A purple pig and a green donkey flew a kite in the middle of the night and ended up sunburnt

He had reached the point where he was paranoid about being paranoid

Jim liked driving around town with his hazard lights on

The blue parrot drove by the hitchhiking mongoose

It was a really good Monday for being a Saturday

Shingle color was not something the couple had ever talked about