Kik@ purplequeen4u 18f gfe snap cam (beware of my impersonators)

Peanuts don’t grow on trees, but cashews do

He poured rocks in the dungeon of his mind

Jenny made the announcement that her baby was an alien

When he had to picnic on the beach, he purposely put sand in other people’s food

Acres of almond trees lined the interstate highway which complimented the crazy driving nuts

He wondered why at 18 he was old enough to go to war, but not old enough to buy cigarettes.

They got there early, and they got really good seats

When I was little I had a car door slammed shut on my hand and I still remember it quite vividly

That was how he came to win $1 million

The secret ingredient to his wonderful life was crime

For the 216th time, he said he would quit drinking soda after this last Coke

He took one look at what was under the table and noped the hell out of there

The llama couldn’t resist trying the lemonade

They called out her name time and again, but were met with nothing but silence

Henry couldn’t decide if he was an auto mechanic or a priest

Peanuts don’t grow on trees, but cashews do

She opened up her third bottle of wine of the night

The gruff old man sat in the back of the bait shop grumbling to himself as he scooped out a handful of worms

The sign said there was road work ahead so he decided to speed up

Best friends are like old tomatoes and shoelaces