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Barking dogs and screaming toddlers have the unique ability to turn friendly neighbors into cranky enemies

Lucifer was surprised at the amount of life at Death Valley

He told us a very exciting adventure story

He picked up trash in his spare time to dump in his neighbor’s yard

I used to practice weaving with spaghetti three hours a day but stopped because I didn’t want to die alone

As she walked along the street and looked in the gutter, she realized facemasks had become the new cigarette butts

Some bathing suits just shouldn’t be worn by some people

She had the gift of being able to paint songs

Cats are good pets, for they are clean and are not noisy

The fish dreamed of escaping the fishbowl and into the toilet where he saw his friend go

Mom didn’t understand why no one else wanted a hot tub full of jello

The irony of the situation wasn’t lost on anyone in the room

I was starting to worry that my pet turtle could tell what I was thinking

She wanted to be rescued, but only if it was Tuesday and raining

The opportunity of a lifetime passed before him as he tried to decide between a cone or a cup

Karen realized the only way she was getting into heaven was to cheat

The tart lemonade quenched her thirst, but not her longing

It was at that moment that he learned there are certain parts of the body that you should never Nair

Last Friday I saw a spotted striped blue worm shake hands with a legless lizard

25 years later, she still regretted that specific moment