A quiet house is nice until you are ordered to stay in it for months 
Please wait outside of the house
That must be the tenth time Iâve been arrested for selling deep-fried cigars
- Honestly, I didnât care much for the first season, so I didnât bother with the second.
Today I heard something new and unmemorable.
I love eating toasted cheese and tuna sandwiches. The efficiency we have at removing trash has made creating trash more acceptable.
The waves were crashing on the shore; it was a lovely sight. It was a really good Monday for being a Saturday
Mothers spend months of their lives waiting on their children. We will not allow you to bring your pet armadillo along.
Getting up at dawn is for the birds. Iâll have you know Iâve written over fifty novels
His confidence would have bee admirable if it wasnât for his stupidity
Sometimes it is better to just walk away from things and go back to them later when youâre in a better frame of mind
The wake behind the boat told of the past while the open sea for told life in the unknown future
It doesnât sound like that will ever be on my travel list
It was the first time he had ever seen someone cook dinner on an elephant
There arenât enough towels in the world to stop the sewage flowing from his mouth
Situps are a terrible way to end your day
This made him feel like an old-style rootbeer float smells
She always had an interesting perspective on why the world must be flat
I currently have 4 windows open up⌠and I donât know why
The rain pelted the windshield as the darkness engulfed us
Donât put peanut butter on the dogâs nose