He uses onomatopoeia as a weapon of mental destruction
Flesh-colored yoga pants were far worse than even he feared
He was sitting in a trash can with high street class
Blue sounded too cold at the time and yet it seemed to work for gin
Today I bought a raincoat and wore it on a sunny day
The knives were out and she was sharpening hers
There’s a growing trend among teenagers of using frisbees as go-cart wheels
The door swung open to reveal pink giraffes and red elephants
Charles ate the french fries knowing they would be his last meal
The bug was having an excellent day until he hit the windshield
I checked to make sure that he was still alive
Today arrived with a crash of my car through the garage door
As the rental car rolled to a stop on the dark road, her fear increased by the moment
Mary realized if her calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than her computer browser history
Truth in advertising and dinosaurs with skateboards have much in common
Jason lived his life by the motto, "Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly
That must be the tenth time I’ve been arrested for selling deep-fried cigars
He quietly entered the museum as the super bowl started
Improve your goldfish’s physical fitness by getting him a bicycle
He ran out of money, so he had to stop playing poker