I donât respect anybody who canât tell the difference between Pepsi and Coke
It was her first experience training a rainbow unicorn
Donât put peanut butter on the dogâs nose
She wanted to be rescued, but only if it was Tuesday and raining
Tomatoes make great weapons when water balloons arenât available
Nudist colonies shun fig-leaf couture
Excitement replaced fear until the final moment
Charles ate the french fries knowing they would be his last meal
Waffles are always better without fire ants and fleas
The father died during childbirth
They desperately needed another drummer since the current one only knew how to play bongos
That must be the tenth time Iâve been arrested for selling deep-fried cigars
I want to buy a onesie⌠but know it wonât suit me
The light in his life was actually a fire burning all around him
He was so preoccupied with whether or not he could that he failed to stop to consider if he should
In the end, he realized he could see sound and hear words
Every manager should be able to recite at least ten nursery rhymes backward
He didnât understand why the bird wanted to ride the bicycle
The changing of down comforters to cotton bedspreads always meant the squirrels had returned
She felt that chill that makes the hairs on the back of your neck when he walked into the room