Kik@ purplequeen4u 18f (beware of my impersonators) 🔞

The skeleton had skeletons of his own in the closet.

Your girlfriend bought your favorite cookie crisp cereal but forgot to get milk.

She is never happy until she finds something to be unhappy about; then, she is overjoyed.

The hand sanitizer was actually clear glue.

As she walked along the street and looked in the gutter, she realized facemasks had become the new cigarette butts.

The shark-infested South Pine channel was the only way in or out.

Nothing seemed out of place except the washing machine in the bar.

The beach was crowded with snow leopards.

He shaved the peach to prove a point.

When I was little I had a car door slammed shut on my hand and I still remember it quite vividly.

The delicious aroma from the kitchen was ruined by cigarette smoke.

When nobody is around, the trees gossip about the people who have walked under them.

Grape jelly was leaking out the hole in the roof.

A suit of armor provides excellent sun protection on hot days

t took him a while to realize that everything he decided not to change, he was actually choosing.

Flesh-colored yoga pants were far worse than even he feared.

The lake is a long way from here

He had a vague sense that trees gave birth to dinosaurs

David proudly graduated from high school top of his class at age 97.

Flying fish few by the space station